Bucktown Husband Found Severely Pussy-Whipped

October 18, 2005


Chicago, IL – Jeff Jones was severly pussy-whipped by his wife on Tuesday evening while preparing some Falafel in their Bucktown home. The signs of abuse may have gone undetected for weeks, but Jeff has been sequestered since returning from his honeymoon. The couple recently returned from Africa where Jeff said he had bruises from “falling down some stairs,” and “being chased and beat senseless by wild African tribe elders.” Ben Ralston, college friend of Jeff, felt that the whipping may have had something to do with a scheduling conflict between dinner with Christy’s work friends and a My Morning Jacket concert both scheduled for Saturday night. Ben said that he hoped the whipping didn’t mean Jeff will pull out on Boys Night Out.

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One Response to “Bucktown Husband Found Severely Pussy-Whipped”

  1. anderballs Says:

    hmmm…now that you mention it, I don’t think I’ve seen Jeff since their wedding night. maybe we should send the police over there on a domestic disturbance call…


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